Talk:Fidel Castro/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Calvin999 (talk · contribs) 11:02, 18 March 2015 (UTC)

General

• There are quite a lot of dead and presumed dead links here
  • I've got rid of all of those which were dead; where possible, I have replaced them with live links, and where unable to do so I have removed the article prose that relied upon them. In one instance I have left the link, because alongside it we also have the oriignal page archived, so it is still accessible. Midnightblueowl (talk) 20:40, 21 March 2015 (UTC)

Lead

• Link revolutionary
  • Done (and I've linked politician too, because it looks odd to link one and not the other). Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:08, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
• industry and businesses → One is singular, the other plural. Both should be either singular or plural.
  • I've made them both singular. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:08, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
• reforms implemented → reforms were implemented
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:08, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
• The lead is informative, but it's very long. I feel like the second and third paragraphs need trimming a bit.
  • I can appreciate that concern, although it is very difficult to pick on anything in particular that could be removed. If you had any suggestions it would be good to hear them. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:08, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
    • I've trimmed both the second and third paragraphs down somewhat; hope it looks okay ? Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:36, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

Early life - Youth 1926–47

• successful growing → successful at growing
  • I meant to convey that he had gained financial success here, so I've changed it to "become financially successful by growing sugar cane" Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:08, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
• and later second wife → and later on, second wife
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:08, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

Early life - Rebellion and Marxism 1947–50

• mostly exiled Dominicans and Cubans → mostly Cubans and exiled Dominicans
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:08, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
• In April 1948, Castro traveled to Bogotá, Colombia, with a Cuban student group sponsored by President Juan Perón's Argentine government. There, the assassination of popular leftist leader Jorge Eliécer Gaitán Ayala led to widespread rioting and clashes between the governing Conservatives – backed by the army – and leftist Liberals. → need citations at the end of them.
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:08, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
• Each sentence needs a citation at the end of it.
  • I have done so in a few examples, although in many cases one sentence is clearly thematically connected to that before it, with the citations thus going at the end of the second sentence. Otherwise I fear that we get a little too cluttered with citations Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:08, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
    • it's pretty normal and expected to have them at the end of each sentence.  — ₳aron 21:17, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

Cuban Revolution - The Movement and the Moncada Barracks attack 1952–53

• Responding to the attack, Batista's government proclaimed martial law, ordering a violent crackdown on dissent, and imposing strict media censorship. → needs a citation
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:17, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
• Propaganda broadcast misinformation about the event, claiming that the rebels → this doesn't make sense
  • I have altered the prose accordingly. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:17, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

Cuban revolution - Imprisonment and the 26th of July Movement 1953–55

• Meanwhile, Castro's wife Mirta gained employment in the Ministry of the Interior, something he discovered through a radio announcement. → needs a citation
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:17, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
• Please place citations at the end of every sentence throughout the article
• 25 November 1956 → So far, you've used both British and American stylisation of dates. I'm guessing the correct one for a Cuban article would be the American. So this example is correct if so, but previously you have used month, day year.
  • You're right; it should be American. I am more familiar with the British system, hence this error. Midnightblueowl (talk) 21:17, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
    • (Me too, it's the correct way :P)  — ₳aron 23:44, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

... more to follow

Cuban revolution - Guerrilla war 1956–59

• including the Castros → Should be Castro's? With an apostrophe.
  • As far as I'm aware, "Castro's" would imply that we are referring to something that belonged to the Castro brothers, whereas "Castros" would be correct in this instance. However I'm a little unsure as to whether there are differences between American English and British English on this issue. Midnightblueowl (talk) 19:57, 25 March 2015 (UTC)
• Che Guevara, and → You don't need a comma when using 'and'
  • Ah, the Oxford comma. I'm a big fan of it and it is the norm in American English, so I have left this one in if that's okay. Midnightblueowl (talk) 19:57, 25 March 2015 (UTC)
• began launching raids on small army posts to obtain weaponry. → I'm not sure why the citation hasn't been placed at the end of this sentence instead of half way through it?
  • The citation applied only to the first half of the sentence. I have altered the prose accordingly to clarify things. Midnightblueowl (talk) 19:57, 25 March 2015 (UTC)
• In January 1957 → comma after 1957
  • I'm not sure that that would be essential here, and I am concerned that we end up with too many commas in quick succession in that sentence. Midnightblueowl (talk) 19:57, 25 March 2015 (UTC)
• With volunteers boosting the rebel forces to over 200, in July 1957 Castro divided his army into three columns, commanded by himself, his brother, and Guevara.[94] The MR-26-7 members operating in urban areas continued agitation, sending supplies to Castro, and on 16 February 1957 he met with other senior members to discuss tactics; here he met Celia Sánchez, who would become a close friend.[95] → There's an inconsistency with time formatting. You go from July 1957 to 16 February 1957. Is this intentional?
• Across Cuba, anti-Batista groups carried out bombings and sabotage; police responded with mass arrests, torture, and extrajudicial executions. → Needs citing.
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 20:09, 25 March 2015 (UTC)
• In 1957 he met with leading → Comma after 1957
• By 1958, Batista was under increasing pressure, a result of his military failures coupled with increasing domestic and foreign criticism surrounding his administration's press censorship, torture, and extrajudicial executions → Needs citing.
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 20:09, 25 March 2015 (UTC)
• Batista responded with an all-out-attack, Operation Verano. The army aerially bombarded forested areas and villages suspected of aiding the militants, while 10,000 soldiers commanded by General Eulogio Cantillo surrounded the Sierra Maestra, driving north to the rebel encampments. → Both need citing.
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 20:09, 25 March 2015 (UTC)
• Fearing Castro was a socialist, the U.S. instructed Cantillo to oust Batista. → Needs citing.
  • Done. Midnightblueowl (talk) 20:09, 25 March 2015 (UTC)

Have you got any further comments User:Calvin999 ? There's no real rush on my behalf, I'm just checking in ! Midnightblueowl (talk) 18:21, 7 April 2015 (UTC)

Yes. I've been a bit time poor in the last nine days because I've been really ill and also been on holiday for 4 days. I took my laptop with me hoping to edit of a evening but I was still ill on holiday unfortunately.  — ₳aron 22:37, 7 April 2015 (UTC)

Ah, hope you get well soon so that you can enjoy that holiday ₳aron! Best for now, Midnightblueowl (talk) 13:04, 8 April 2015 (UTC)

Thanks. I'm back now but still getting better.  — ₳aron 16:57, 8 April 2015 (UTC)

...continuing I've read through the rest and I'd say that make sure that there are citations at the end of every sentence so that everything can be easily sourced and found. It's well written and really interesting, but I'm worried that it's a bit overly detailed. It's an extremely long article. So I'm putting this up for a second opinion.  — ₳aron 14:03, 14 April 2015 (UTC)

I've had a very quick look through the article. Bearing in mind the notability of the subject, I would say that the article is not excessively long. I've taken longer articles to FA. Simon Burchell (talk) 17:22, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

Okay, thanks. I'm satisfied that this can be passed, then.  — ₳aron 19:05, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.