Talk:Embodiment theory in anthropology

I've provided peer review on this through the coursewiki. Let me know if you can't access it and I'll try posting it here instead. --ngoodell42

Peer review comments…

This was very informative, clear and enjoyable to read introduction to this topic. We get a lot of specific material on embodiment and gender and race (though the examples leave men and white folks comparatively disembodied) as well as the uptake in anthropology.

Here are some areas where I would like to know more:

• How does Cartesian dualism infrom anthropological practice? What kinds of topics and descriptions emerge from it? What ways of thinking are customary to writers who don't question it?
• Can we have an example or two of "techniques of the body"?
• And of the two approaches laid out by Meleau-Ponty and Bourdieu?
• Embodiment in anthropological scholarship is wide ranging, but is there a short list of ethnographic work or archaeological studies that build on this theoretical base?

A segment of my comments is going to encourage you to structure and write this less like an essay and more like an encyclopedia article in various ways. I recommend that you…

• Split the lead into two paragraphs, with the second pagraph reframing the "This shift was largely born of dissatisfaction…" into "Embodiment-based approaches in anthropology were born of dissatsifaction with…" As it stands now, "When the body…" is describing non-embodiment approaches and that has to be made clear.
• Add a third paragraph to the lead summarizing the key approaches / effforts / highlights of embodiment theory as practiced in anthropology.
• Add a subhead over "Cartesian Dualism" just called "Background"
• Because Wikipedia articles are not written like essay, they don't use transition sentences like "It is from this broader project to oppose…" Instead rephrase this same content and but it at the beginning of the background section.
• Put Csordas in the background, and literally at the end of the sentence under MMP & PB.
• "The relationship between feminist theory and embodiment theory is understandably fraught" — assumes prior knowledge. Rephrase to explain to the unfamiliar reader.
• "Judith Butler approaches embodiment in a much more nuanced capacity." — this is your judgment and a transitional comparison. Find a way to state facts instead… "Judith Butler address embodiment in X, Y, Z. This work attempts to bridge…"

And some minor things to improve:

• Identify and give full names for people quoted (Marcel Mauss, Threadcraft) on their first appearance in a section (since Wikipedia readers often skip sections).
• "it was perceived as a universal or essential aspect of being human" — I'm not 100% sure whether the "it" here is the body or the self
• Add some concrete nouns after "institutionalized surveillance and state discipline", like "in barracks, factories, schools, and prisons."
• After a lot of clarity about time and history in the Davis section, the hooks section feels oddly disconnected from time. When in history are all these verbs happening?
• "auction block in Green Hill" — specify this is for a slave auction.

Cheers! Carwil (talk) 21:08, 26 April 2022 (UTC)