Talk:Eli Savit

Latest comment: 3 years ago by Jack Frost in topic Did you know nomination

Did you know nomination

edit
The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Jack Frost (talk01:13, 28 February 2021 (UTC)Reply

  • Reviewed: Tomoki Suzuki (athlete)
  • Comment: Can create more hooks if needed. Article was a draft that I cleaned up, moved to article-space, and expanded within the past day.

Moved to mainspace by Elliot321 (talk) and P9schink (talk). Nominated by Elliot321 (talk) at 18:40, 3 February 2021 (UTC).Reply

  Hi Elliot321, here is my review. The nominated article meets the criteria for being new enough and long enough, seems NPOV, is very well sourced. I personally think ALT1 is more interesting than the first hook, but the current wording doesn't make the meaning quite as clear as it could be. Firstly, "his election" doesn't tell you what position of authority Savit had to make that change, and I'm not sure about "ended cash bail", either. I suggest:

Let me know whether you are happy with ALT2 or propose further changes. Also, before I approve, this sentence was taken verbatim from source and need to be reworded - "He graduated from Kalamazoo College, where he was voted senior class commencement speaker." Rcsprinter123 (sing) 21:40, 19 February 2021 (UTC)Reply

@Rcsprinter123: I'm good with ALT2. I rephrased the problematic sentence, sorry about that (this was created by an IP originally, and I didn't think to check for copyvios, oh well). Thanks for the review! Elliot321 (talk | contribs) 18:23, 23 February 2021 (UTC)Reply
  That's great, and we are now ready to approve (ALT2 approved). Thanks, Rcsprinter123 (negotiate) 19:30, 23 February 2021 (UTC)Reply