Talk:Disease X/GA1
Latest comment: 4 years ago by DannyS712 in topic GA Review
GA Review
editThe following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: DannyS712 (talk · contribs) 03:26, 19 April 2020 (UTC)
Review
editGA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not) |
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Overall: |
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Notes
edit- Currently falls under general sanctions as part of Wikipedia:General sanctions/Coronavirus disease 2019. Will need to evaluate stability criteria in more detail --DannyS712 (talk) 03:29, 19 April 2020 (UTC)
- No recent pattern of rollbacks or undos, no heated discussions on talk but generally looks stable DannyS712 (talk) 03:36, 19 April 2020 (UTC)
- Lede:
The rationale was to ensure
- rationale for what? Suggest "The rationale for adopting the placeholder name" or "The WHO adopted the placeholder name to"- Done, used the latter version.
- #Rationale:
to stop the outbreaks turning into
- "stop the outbreaks from turning into"- Done
- #Rationale:
The Disease X placeholder acknowledged the potential for a future epidemic that could be caused by an unknown pathogen, and to ensure WHO's planning and capabilities were flexible enough to adapt to such an event.
- not sure what the second half is supposed to mean - its addition was to ensure...?- Done, changed to
,and by its inclusion, challenged the WHO to ensure their planning and capabilities ...
?
- Done, changed to
- #Rationale:
At the announcement
- what announcement?- Done, changed to
At the 2018 announcement of the updated shortlist of blueprint priority diseases,
- Done, changed to
- #Rationale:
the WHO said "...
, andArne Røttingen, of the R&D Blueprint Special Advisory Group, said: "...
- suggest using a consistent approach for the similar introductions in terms of whether to use a colon or not (applies elsewhere in that paragraph as well)- Done, fixed to a colon throughout
- #Adoption: In the first sentence,
and that
is a bit confusing, since the first quote has no "that" - perhaps replace it with just "saying"?- Done
- #H7N9 (2018):
China would not share samples of the new H7N9 strain, however, they eventually brought the outbreak under control and the urgency dissipated.
- "however..." is a separate clause, and joining it with a comma is confusing since however is also followed by a comma. Suggest "strain. However,"- Done
- #Synthetic viruses / bioweapons:
On the announcement
- what announcement?- Done, changed to
At the 2018 announcement of the updated shortlist of blueprint priority diseases,
- Done, changed to
- #Synthetic viruses / bioweapons:
media speculation included the idea that it could be created intentionally
- what is "it"?- Done, changed to
the media speculated that a future Disease X could be created intentionally
- Done, changed to
- #Synthetic viruses / bioweapons:
Røttingen felt it was less likely but cautioned
- I would generally be cautious when ascribing feelings, but, even if it is proper to do so, less is a comparison - less likely than what?- Done, fiwed this whole phrase to
Røttingen said that while it was unlikely that a future Disease X would originate from a bio-weapon, he cautioned by saying,
- Done, fiwed this whole phrase to
- #In popular culture: Can examples of some of the books be given?
- Done, added the titles of two examples in the text.
- Image caption:
Marion Koopmans, WHO R&D Blueprint Special Advisory Group
- "member of the"? Jeremy Farrar's caption says chair of the..., here it is just the group- Done, added
member of the
.
- Done, added
- #Synthetic viruses / bioweapons:
Røttingen said that while it was unlikely that a future Disease X would originate from a bio-weapon, however, he cautioned by saying, "...
- confusing- Done, I have changed to
Røttingen said it was unlikely that a future Disease X would originate from a synthetic virus or bio-weapon, however, he noted the seriousness of such an event, saying,
?
- Done, I have changed to
Discussion
edit- I have placed this on hold pending resolution of the issues identified above --DannyS712 (talk) 17:07, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
- Hi DannyS712. Thank you for taking the time to do the review, and for those very helpful comments. I think I have been able to address all the comments, and have updated the article accordingly. I look forward to hearing from you. Britishfinance (talk) 18:35, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
- @Britishfinance: One more issue I found DannyS712 (talk) 22:10, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
- @DannyS712:, hopefully I have been able to fix that? thanks. Britishfinance (talk) 22:28, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
- @Britishfinance: I changed the comma before "however" to a period; lgtm, approving DannyS712 (talk) 22:32, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
- @DannyS712:, hopefully I have been able to fix that? thanks. Britishfinance (talk) 22:28, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
- @Britishfinance: One more issue I found DannyS712 (talk) 22:10, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
- Hi DannyS712. Thank you for taking the time to do the review, and for those very helpful comments. I think I have been able to address all the comments, and have updated the article accordingly. I look forward to hearing from you. Britishfinance (talk) 18:35, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.