Talk:Carpenter Street (Star Trek: Enterprise)/GA1
Latest comment: 9 years ago by 23W in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: 23W (talk · contribs) 06:17, 29 January 2015 (UTC)
- "something that was attributed to pre-Thanksgiving travel": rephrase as "a decline that was attributed ..."
- "The critical response was mostly negative": rephrase as "Critical response was mostly negative".
- "Using a hand scanner": comma after scanner.
- I notice a lot of thens in the plot section. Most of them can be removed, as the section already moves in the historical present tense.
- "his sixth of the series": sixth what?
- "He has also previously": shorten to "He previously".
- "who appeared for fourth occasion": fourth occasion or four occasions?
- Are the days of the week relevant in the last paragraph of the production section?
Cool article. On hold for 14 days. 23W 09:27, 31 January 2015 (UTC)