Talk:Belenggu/GA1

Latest comment: 12 years ago by Crisco 1492 in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Mark Arsten (talk · contribs) 15:03, 12 March 2012 (UTC)Reply

Alright, looks interesting, I'll do the review within the next few days. Mark Arsten (talk) 15:03, 12 March 2012 (UTC)Reply

  • Ok, as I go through I'm going to make some of the changes that come to mind, feel free to push back.
  • The lead looks ok, there's nothing wrong with a spoiler in the second sentence, though some people do find that vexing. You might want to mention if this was written early/late in Pane's career.
  • Roughly midway, as he focused on non-fiction after 1950
  • WP:PLUSING is more of a FAC thing than a GA thing, but try to keep it to a minimum anyway.
  • I'll take a look.
  • Advisor.js is giving me a "Bad ISBN checksum" notice.
  • Don't know why, that's copied straight from my edition. Worldcat doesn't have it either (Worldcat also doesn't have some of the early printings)
  • Makes sense (at the school now, on my break). The book only gives me the 10 digit number.
  • Dabs and links are fine.
  • Might want to briefly explain what Lekra is.
  • Done.
  • Wow, that really is a depressing plot, I'm half-surprised no one committed suicide.
  • Under Influences it might be good to note a little more about how psychoanalysis influenced the book.
  • I'll see if any of the sources I have ready access go into more detail. Don't think I saw anything, and Pane died in 1970, so any of his writings may be hard to come by. (Even the biggest hits take a while to be reissued here) Crisco 1492 (talk) 23:34, 12 March 2012 (UTC)Reply
  • I think (if I remember correctly, Google books doesn't open well here) that Christie discusses how the past holds the characters back, but he doesn't tie it explicitly with Freud.
  • Note [A] looks messed up for some reason.
  • I'll try and use that eref template.
  • Changed to {{efn}}
  • Are there any minor characters in the book that should be mentioned?
  • There are a couple, but they won't be sourced anywhere but the book. Is that alright?
  • Alright, I'll put Hartono, the driver (Ahmad, I think), and Tini's social group in later when I have my copy in front of me.
  • I see it as being related to the release date, but Style would be okay too.
  • I don't mind it in style.
  • "Meanwhile, opponents of the novel dismissed it as "pornographic", putting emphasis on traditionally taboo acts like prostitution and adultery." I think "putting" is dangling here.
  • Perhaps "... emphasising traditionally taboo acts like prostitution and adultery."?
  • Is Balfas' quote in Reception a translation, or did he write in English?
  • Try to be consistent if you note the reviewers' nationalities.
  • From my look, only Christie and Taum aren't explicitly stated. However, both are noted as being related to a particular institution, with a location given. (As a side note, Taum was on the panel which went over my undergraduate thesis).
  • Is Christie the only Westerner that you can find who wrote about the book?
  • Only freely accessible one I could find. I think I saw a couple on Jstor, but 1) my satellite modem blocks jstor for some reason and 2) I don't have a subscription.
  • I spotchecked reference #10 off google books, no close paraphrasing or failed verification.
  • Spotchecked reference #9 on google books, no close paraphrasing or failed verification but in the copy I looked at the information is on page 71, not 70.
  • To be double checked.
  • You're right, changed.
  • So by my count right now I only have to cut back on the noun + ings and add more about the characters. I should also take a look to see if the sources explicitly state a connection with Freud more than just it reflects his theory. Right? Crisco 1492 (talk) 02:06, 13 March 2012 (UTC)Reply