Talk:Battle of Pegae/GA1

Latest comment: 8 years ago by BlueMoonset in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: Sturmvogel 66 (talk · contribs) 20:39, 20 March 2016 (UTC)Reply


I'll get to this shortly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 20:39, 20 March 2016 (UTC)Reply

  • No DABs, external links OK
  • The last paragraph of the lede should be folded into the main body if you want to get into a historiographical discussion on the sources.
  • Byzantines forces were routed in the battle of Achelou No 's' on Byzantine and capitalize battle
  • In the four year to follow they "years that followed"
  • successful campaigns reaching the walls comma after campaigns
  • infant emperor Constantine VII capitalize emperor and 919 admiral Romanos Lekapenos capitalize admiral
  • death, Bulgarian monarch "the" Bulgarian monarch.
  • sent his army in Byzantine Thrace into
  • modern Burgas but part comma after Burgas
  • preparing to invade Bulgaria urged Simeon I to act "caused" not urged
  • Theme of Thrace Adrianople comma after Thrace
  • Pigae typo
  • and a certain Photinus, son of Platipodos, why is this important enough to be worth noting
  • was killed along many others while trying along "with"
  • escaped on the board of a dromon "escaped aboard a dromon"
  • soldiers perished by the sword, drowned or were captured a little dramatic, don't you think? How about "soldiers were killed..."
  • More in a bit.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 01:07, 9 April 2016 (UTC)Reply
  • The Golden Horn is a waterway, do you mean that they looted Pera and/or Galata on the other side of the Golden Horn?
  • Byzantine throne in favour of Simeon I replace Simeon I with "himself"
  • Capitalize empress
  • Simeon I was in charge of the siege of Adrianople while another army was sent to the Byzantine capital. Change to Simeon I remained at the siege...
  • A few weeks later they seized Adrianople Better to say that Adrianople surrendered.
  • Romanos I learnt about the negotiations and managed to outbid the Bulgarian offer How about: "Romanos I thus learned about the negotiations and outbid the Bulgarians."--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 20:10, 9 April 2016 (UTC)Reply

Query edit

Sturmvogel 66, where does this nomination stand? I see that Gligan posted to your talk page a couple of weeks ago that the issues you raised above had been addressed in the article. Are there other issues that need to be taken care of? Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 15:40, 29 April 2016 (UTC)Reply