Talk:Bagman (Better Call Saul)/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

---

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Bilorv (talk · contribs) 02:20, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• At the Emmys – More formal and clear is At the Primetime Emmy Awards.

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:07, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• Why the Variety citation in the plot? If the sentence isn't clear from watching the episode alone then rewrite so that we only present such information (and then analysis / writer intention can come later). I also can't see what Variety is actually verifying of that paragraph.

 Done Removed. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:08, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• and immediately depart can be omitted (sentence would still imply that without that bit).

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:07, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• only truck that is still drivable is more concise as only remaining drivable truck (could even drop "remaining").

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:07, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• As they camp overnight ... took me a couple of tries to parse due to the complex comma usage: I'd prefer a semicolon so it goes ... his work for Lalo; Mike warns ...

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:07, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• Is it worth mentioning something about Mike and Jimmy's physical condition (the latter in particular) or the water situation? I know a plot summary can't communicate this in full but to me the episode is strikingly memorable because of the extreme physical effects on Jimmy and the precarity of their lives just by having to trek so far in those conditions.
• I'll let you off with 404 words against a 400 word limit but make sure after any changes it's not far over (or ideally over at all).

 Done Got it to 400 words. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:18, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• Gilligan had been able to make arrangements to direct one episode – less clunky as Gilligan had made arrangements to direct one episode.

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:07, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• continually teased Gilligan in the weeks leading up before the episode's filming that it was going to be well-suited for him – Perhaps continually teased Gilligan that the episode was well-suited for him in the weeks prior to filming?

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:07, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• Gilligan credits his production team ... – Past tense when quoting an interview, "credited".

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:07, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• Gilligan wanted Bob Odenkirk to employ method acting techniques, and did supply him with weighed bags to tote, but Odenkirk had drawn the line at drinking urine – Is this not a joke? I wanted Bob to be method and drink his own pee. He’s pretty method, but he drew the line at that. I'm not sure how serious this bit is. But the weighted bags of a bit less than the 150 lbs they thought it would actually weigh is a good thing to highlight.

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:18, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• ... other American "original cable telecasts" that aired ... – My #1 pet peeve is the frequent "quote from nowhere". Without the quotes is fine, unless it needs to be a direct quote, in which case say in prose which organization you are quoting.

 Done Removed. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:07, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• I would put IndieWire and Den of Geek in italics here as in this context they're publications, rather than companies.

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:07, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• Rowspans are needed in the accolades table for accessibility reasons as here (ideally a caption too, and you can use {{sronly}} on it so that it only appears to users with screen readers).

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:18, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• Image shouldn't used fixed pixels, I think, in case a reader's screen varies wildly in size from your screen. You can use upright if it needs to differ from the default size. Alt text would be nice, too.

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:18, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• with many calling it one of the best episodes of the series – Which reviewers specifically? Probably worth citing inline (in the body), possibly bundled as a note if it's more than three.

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 16:28, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

• I'd like a bit of a meatier "Critical response" section—for instance, is one comparison to another work all you can get from the Rolling Stone review? We've got a good amount of content about directing and visual style, but I'm left wanting more detail on what reviewers said about the characterization, acting, plot, maybe soundtrack even. GamesRadar+ is a source that looks very nice to me that could be worth adding.

 Done Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 20:36, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

No stability, neutrality or copyvio issues; for broadness and focus the article follows a very established episode article format well. My favorite Better Call Saul episode (... so far) so good to see it getting the attention it deserves! — Bilorv (talk) 02:20, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

@Bilorv: All done. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 20:36, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

The image still specifies 272x272px. Also: ... did supply him with bags to tote weighing 75 pounds each – The source doesn't say this; rather, Bob wanted them pretty heavy, but not that heavy. — Bilorv (talk) 02:36, 12 March 2021 (UTC)

@Bilorv: Image, only with the text, have been fixed. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 03:49, 12 March 2021 (UTC)

Alright, well I think more could be done in the future to expand "Reception" even further, but we're definitely over the line for GA now, so it's a pass for GA from me. I appreciate the fast fixes. — Bilorv (talk) 11:03, 12 March 2021 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.