Talk:And Maggie Makes Three/GA1

GA Review

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Looks good. Here are a few things that should be fixed/changed:

• The plot switches between past and present tense within the "memories". The first and second paragraphs are past while the third switches back to the present. Fiction is usually written in present tense, but considering these are recounts of past events it is appropriate to use past tense but should be consistent.
• Crittenden was taking a beginners writing program - "beginners' ".
• When Mirkin first talked to Crittenden, he thought she was a really nice woman that was very mature.[5] Crittenden was only 23 years old at the time, which Mirkin thought was incredibly young, but he didn't hold that against her and she was hired.[5] - seems to stray off-topic. The fact that "he didn't hold it against her" seems irrelevant to me when just "he liked her and hired her" would do (though not as primitive!).
• "Do it for her", obviously referring to Maggie - "obviously" is POV and we can do without.
• Maybe mention in the infobox image caption that Homer has altered "Don't forget: you're here forever" to say "Do it for her", just so it clearly accompanies the production/reception commentary.

I'll place this on hold for a week so that you can make changes - WP:GOOD luck! :P —97198 (talk) 11:12, 28 November 2008 (UTC)

Thanks for reviewing. I think I have addressed all of your concerns. :) TheLeftorium 14:59, 28 November 2008 (UTC)

Looks perfect, I'll pass it. :) —97198 (talk) 04:16, 29 November 2008 (UTC)

Awesome, thanks! --TheLeftorium 09:24, 29 November 2008 (UTC)