Talk:Alvin Clark (schooner)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 15:01, 23 April 2020 (UTC)

Comments

• Move those refs out of the lead and put them in the main part of the article where you've expanded upon everything you've said in the lead.
• Infobox has "{{{DESIGNATED_OTHER1_ABBR}}}" which clearly needs addressing.
• Infobox mentions "Square stern" but this isn't mentioned anywhere in the article.
• "foot of Sixth Avenue. " is mentioned in the lead and infobox but not the article.
• Ref 1 doesn't appear to provide any sourcing information, it's just a link to a search engine.
• " in Menominee, Michigan at t" comma after Michigan.
• "rigged as a brigantine with a square rigged" any chance of avoiding that repetition?
• " in Trenton, Michigan[7] in" comma after Michigan.
• "1847,[5][3]" ref order.
• "the ship for shipping" repetitive.
• "it was it sold in 1852.[8] The second owner of the ship was" before he sold it in 1852 to ... i.e. merge sentences and make it active (he sold) rather than passive (it was sold).
• I'm not an expert and I note Great Lakes is mentioned in the lead but nowhere else, no lakes are name-checked and this assumes our readers are familiar with the geography. And I'm not...
• " to Oconto, Wisconsin to " comma after Wisconsin.
• Consider linking technical terms like "hold", "hatch", "mate", "salvage rights", "slip" etc.
• "Alvin Clark[11]," ref after comma.
• " recovering artifacts[5] " move ref to end of sentence.
• "drunk" perhaps "inebriated" for encyclopedic tone.
• AVOID SHOUTING in ref titles.
• "deemed beyond saving, and it was deemed" deemed x 2.
• "p. 220-21" should be "pp. 220–21".
• "Anchor - Wisconsin " should be en-dash, not hyphen.

That's all I have for now, so it's on hold. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 11:28, 24 April 2020 (UTC)

All issues are fixed. Lettler (talk) 15:33, 24 April 2020 (UTC)

Promoted. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 15:54, 24 April 2020 (UTC)