Talk:A Ballads/GA1

Latest comment: 7 years ago by CaliforniaDreamsFan in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Reviewer: Cartoon network freak (talk · contribs) 12:32, 6 July 2016 (UTC)Reply

Full review coming soon... Best, Cartoon network freak (talk) 12:32, 6 July 2016 (UTC)Reply

Lead edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*around the globe → worldwide
  • A Best, and three months after her sixth studio album Rainbow. → A Best; it premiered three months after the release of her sixth studio album, Rainbow (2002)
  • The album compiles → The compilation
  • single's → singles
  • 1998 to → 1998 and
  • material are divided into newly arrangement remixes and the original versions → material is divided into new-arrangement remixes and the original versions.
  • new songs; → new songs—
  • six formats and photographed by JFKK → six formats featuring a photograph by JFKK
  • for consisting → for including
  • aimed at → aimed on
  • certified million → certified Million
  • appearing in commercial endorsements in Japan → appearing during Japanese commercial endorsements.

Infobox edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*Remove the full stop after "artwork"

Background and material edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*Ayumi Hamasaki → Hamasaki
  • website promoting the album, and → website that promoted the album and
  • Set "unfinished" after "song"
  • telling her → telling them
  • Due to the positive, and some sad responses from her fans → Due to the mixed response of her fanbase
  • which was titled → which was later named
  • said "I had never before written lyrics that were based on messages received directly from my fans. It was with "Rainbow" that I decided to give this approach a try." → confessed that "[she] had never before written lyrics that were based on messages received directly from [her] fans. It was with "Rainbow" that [she] decided to give this approach a try".
  • and is her → with it portraying her
  • were released either as singles or promotional recordings → was released either as a single or as a promotional recording
  • recordings, all between the years of 1998 and 2003 → recording between the years 1998 and 2003.
  • It consists → The album consists
  • tracks; two of them are new recordings, → tracks, including two new recordings—
  • album's tracks → album's songs
  • Seven of the album's tracks feature new arrangements and compositions: "Appears", "You", "To Be", "M", "Seasons", "A Song for ××", and "Who...", whilst the remaining songs: "Key", "Hanabi", "Dearest", and "Voyage" are represented with their original versions. → Seven of the album's tracks—"Appears",......— feature new arrangements and compositions, whilst songs "Key", ..... are included with their original versions.
  • You may place the last sentence somewhere above this section, as things like that are always mentioned earlier in sections

Songs edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*Hamasaki's process → the background and development
  • she hosted → Hamasaki hosted
  • Set a comma after "Rainbow"
  • by her fans → from her fans
  • but because there were too many → reword; it sounds like class-6-English
  • because Hamasaki → as Hamasaki
  • and was purely remastered -> with it being purely remastered
  • "Dolls" was the second original track that was included on the album, and is a J-pop-influenced pop ballad. → "Dolls", a J-pop influenced pop ballad, remained the sophomore original track to make part of the record.
  • track is "Voyage", → track, "Voyage"
  • which was described → remove "which"
  • remove "that was"
  • The final track is "Sotsugyō Shashin". → The closing track for A Ballads was "Sotsugyō Shashin"
  • her and the → she and the
  • You repeat "in order" two consecutive times
  • Try to alternate with "song(s)"

Release edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*around the globe → worldwide
  • disc's → discs
  • other, and the inner booklet cover had four different covers of the two clones -> other, with the inner booklet portraying four different photographs of the clones.
  • Remove the semicolon and start a new sentence here.
  • try to use another word for clones, as it's already used two times
  • cover, and → cover and
  • try to use another word for slipcase for alternating

Reception edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*to connect to → to connect with
  • also selected → also pointed out
  • "classic" and → "classic", and
  • songwriting and vulnerability → her songwriting and her vulnerability
  • member at → member of
  • the new additions to the album → its new additions

Commercial performance edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*in Japan. The album debuted at number one on the Oricon Albums Chart, replacing → in Japan, with it debuting at number one on the Oricon Albums Chart and replacing
  • top spot; → set full stop
  • The "better source needed"-tag may be removed
Some of the information was removed as its claimed that GeoCities is not a good enough source.
  • and was subsequently replaced → try to reword
  • units and sold over 760,000 total units → units; it brought 760,000 total sales.
  • Well, try to reword the parts of the section I didn't reviewed, as it uses the same words and scheme. Also, don't build clipped sentences and try to make them long. In rest, the info is OK.
Did my best in removing some info and changing it.

Promotions edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*Rename section to "Promotion"
  • in commercial endorsements in Japan. → during Japanese commercial endorsements.
  • The album's only promotional release was "Rainbow", which was used as the theme songs → The compilation's only release was promotional song "Rainbow", which was used as the theme song
  • Unlink "talk show"
  • it was revealed → it is revealed

Track listing edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*All lyrics written by Ayumi Hamasaki, except track 14 (written by Yumi Matsutoya).. → All lyrics were written by Hamasaki with the exception of Yumi Matsutoya's contribution on track 14.4
  • CD and digital download. → This is maybe not a good title for a header; look at this for a valid example.
I believe that the header is good enough, consdering that it didn't have any other differentiating track list of format releases, etc.
  • You may place the note somewhere where "Crea" is provided.

Charts edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*Yearly chart → Yearly charts
  • Ranking chart → Ranking charts
  • What is a ranking chart? + the reference does not provide the peak position here.
Has been removed; its a rank on the artists page

Release history edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*Unlink label and format.
  • (five different formats) → may be overfluous

Notes edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*A Ballads received a 4× Platinum certification for 1,600,000 copies, however the 4× Platinum threshold was depreciated in 2003. → A Ballads received a 4× Platinum certification for selling 1,600,000 copies; this threshold was depreciated in 2003.
  • A selection of tracks, that were promoted through their respective studio albums, may have been included on the album. See the citations to view the promoted tracks in Japan → A selection of tracks which were promoted through their parent studio albums may have been included on the compilation. For further information on the singles, see the citations.
  • Crea is the pseudonym for Ayumi Hamasaki. → Crea acts as a pseudonym for Ayumi Hamasaki.

References edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*NR#8 → Unreliable as it looks like a fansite
Removed.
  • Remove the countries set in (brackets) for the iTunes links
Kept it there; it makes sense if it directs to different pages so the view knows its that country. Removing the countries makes the writing and titles the same.

External links edit

Section status:  

Resolved comments
*flawless


@Cartoon network freak: All done and dusted  . Ping me if there are any more hassles to sort out. CaliforniaDreamsFan (talk · contribs} 03:44, 7 July 2016 (UTC)Reply
@CaliforniaDreamsFan: I think there's something wrong with the sentence at the track listing. I tried to fix it out myself, even by logging out, but with no success. Further comments coming soon on remaining sections. Best, Cartoon network freak (talk) 05:02, 7 July 2016 (UTC)Reply
All done! CaliforniaDreamsFan (talk · contribs} 23:19, 13 July 2016 (UTC)Reply
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.