Talk:2022 Pembroke–Black Creek tornado/GA1

Latest comment: 15 days ago by PCN02WPS in topic GA Review

GA Review

edit

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Nominator: WeatherWriter (talk · contribs) 21:20, 18 March 2024 (UTC)Reply

Reviewer: PCN02WPS (talk · contribs) 20:04, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply


Lead and infobox

  • "and the community of Black Creek, Georgia, United States" → IMO "United States" does not need to be repeated since it's mentioned earlier in that sentence
  Done Removed. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply

Synopsis

  • "moved across Georgia" → might be worth it to link Georgia here since we're in the body now
  Done Wikilinked. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • MLCAPE abbreviation is not used so you don't need to give it when giving the term for the first time (it's also quite a clunky acronym so eliminating it might make it easier on readers)
  Done Removed. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "One of these discrete supercells" → since you use "discrete supercells" in the previous sentence, I think you can get away with just "supercells" here since context and the beginning of the sentence "One of these" makes it clear enough you're talking about the discrete supercells from the previous sentence
  Done Removed “discrete”. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • Is the "meters per second squared" math-mode display common for these types of articles?
  Done A checked on Tornado outbreak of March 31 – April 1, 2023 showed math mode isn’t used, but rather just superscripts. So I converted it to m2/s2, the same way that article does it. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply

Tornado summary

  • "were also damaged" → since this is in a list, you don't need "also"
  Done “Also” removed. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "along C C Road, and heavily damaging" → remove comma
  Done. Removed comma. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • I was going to suggest a link to denudation but that doesn't seem to be the same thing as you're talking about
Yeah, denude in relation to trees/tornadoes means to remove/make bare. In short, remove all trees in an area. It is a word that often is used for stronger tornadoes in the damage surveys. Wiktionary has denudation as a definition in relation to what is being linked to here. Should the Wiktionary definition be linked up with it, or does it matter to much? The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "The tornado then weakened but remained strong" → I get what you mean but this is worded to make it seem like some sort of oxymoron; is there any EF rating change that could be inserted here?
Changed to “The tornado then weakened to EF3 strength as it moved further to the east-northeast… Hopefully that works. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply

Aftermath

  • "The American Red Cross established a shelter" → is there a specific date available here instead of just "after the tornado", since that really doesn't need to be specified?
The shelter was established on the same day as the tornado. Went ahead and specified “On April 5” at the beginning of the sentence, although, that can be removed from the article if needed. The source didn’t specify how many hours after the tornado, but since the tornado was at 5:30 PM, it had to be only a few hours. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "which was heavily damaged by the tornado" → don't need to specify "by the tornado"; maybe "which had been heavily damaged"?
  Done Changed to that wording. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply

Other

  • FN 5 seems to just take me to an interactive map with nothing specific about Georgia or this storm - could this ref be archived, maybe?
That’s the reference. That specific source is used on basically every tornado article as it is an interactive map used by the National Weather Service. Every tornado track and damage location on the official reports is put into it. Archiving doesn’t do anything, since the database/interactive map has a pop up window letting users know they are entering a government website. That (based on when I tried to archive it a couple of months ago) is what is archived, not the actual interactive map/database. Both of the damage photographs in the article come from that interactive map, along with 95% of tornadic-damage photos on Wikipedia. Nothing really can be done about that source. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply

That's all I've got, well done. PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 20:04, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply

I fixed what I could. I asked two questions amid the GAN, but everything else was changed/fixed! Thank you for your time reviewing the article! (Courtesy ping to let you know I made the changes: PCN02WPS. The Weather Event Writer (Talk Page) 20:57, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
Okay, everything looks good. Bummer about the source, but from what I can tell that hasn't been a problem in other tornado GAs so I won't make a fuss about it. Happy to promote. PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 21:15, 27 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.