Talk:2010 Atlantic hurricane season/GA1
Latest comment: 7 years ago by Juliancolton in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Juliancolton (talk · contribs) 15:43, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
Hi, I'll be reviewing this article against the GA criteria. My assessment may take a couple days. Some initial comments:
- It's usually recommended to describe the subject matter in the opening lines before introducing superlatives. In this case, "five-way tie for the third-most active" seems way overstated when shoe-horned into the first sentence. Compare the intro of 2012 AHS, which I find preferable.
- Reworded. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Activity in the Atlantic exceeded activity in the West Pacific for only the second time on record. - pipe in a link to Tropical cyclone basins#Northwestern Pacific Ocean, and maybe reword the sentence to avoid using "activity" twice and make it more clear how activity is defined.
- Activity was represented with an Accumulated cyclone energy (ACE) - either capitalize the whole term or decap "accumulated".
- Impact in 2010 stretched across numerous countries and numerous tropical cyclones. - "impact in 2010" is clumsy, and suggest avoiding "numerous" twice in so short a stretch.
- Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- whereas rip currents produced by Tropical Depression Five killed two people. - whereas suggests contrast; not sure how TD 5 deaths contradict Colin's.
- Reworded. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- It's misleading to say Danielle Major hurricanes Danielle "moved parallel to the East Coast", seeing as it was hundreds of miles east of Bermuda!
- You can probably shorten "East Coast of the United States" to "U.S. East Coast" after the first usage.
- Probably. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Hurricane Paula caused a tourist to drown, while Hurricane Richard left two dead. - where and where?
- Added and added. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Specifically mentioning Bonnie's US impact in the lead but ignoring Earl and Igor in Canada is the ultimate exercise in 'merica.
- Un-ignored. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- In advance of, and during, each hurricane season, → "Before and during..."?
- considered occasionally - switch the word order.
- TSR needs a link/claim to credibility/some sort of explanation of why we should listen to their forecast.
- "featuring" odd word choice.
- Oh yeah?! TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- "Meanwhile" suggests something happening at the same time, not five weeks later.
- Not sure I see the point in having a table of prediction updates as well as a prosified, comprehensive list of the same. Since the information is much more conveniently found in the table, I would recommend summarizing the text to include initial forecasts and rationales, but not every subsequent tweak.
- Contrary to the 2010 Pacific hurricane season - conventional wisdom says Atlantic and EPac activity have an inverse relationship, so not sure how this is "contrary".
- Nuttin' wrong with highlighting the dichotomy. Changed the word. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- documented across the basin, of which 19 - dangling modifier.
- 12 further intensified, [...] and 5 further intensified..." - do we need "further" twice?
- Doubt it. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- only the record-breaking 2005 season and 1933 featured more activity - err... wouldn't 1933 have also been record-breaking? I know what you're trying to convey here, but pretty much every season has broken some sort of record.
- Very true. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- the second such occurrence on record alongside 2005. - "alongside" → "after"
- Throughout the entire Atlantic database - which database?
- The pizza one. #pizzagate TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- allowing anomalously low vertical wind shear to overspread the Atlantic Ocean - it seems odd to say a lack of something can "overspread".
- Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Who's to say ENSO is "first" and SSTs are "second"?
- Removed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Lower sea level pressures—implying increased instability and low-level moisture - several links needed here, or at least reduce some of the jargon.
- Did both. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- An area of low pressure [...] in conjunction with data from a reconnaissance aircraft [...] further organized" - you see the problem.
- Er, I think. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Steered west and eventually west-northwest - by what?
- A big ole ridge. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- attained peak winds of 65 mph - I'd specify "initial peak" or something.
- Alex dove west-southwest - looks more like a gradual departure than a dive, but there we are...
- The precursor disturbance to Alex inundated hundreds of homes - I know "inundated" usually implies flooding in the context of storms, but this should be made more explicit.
- Explicated. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- swollen rivers flooded countless homes - "countless" a bit hyperbolic for an encyclopedia.
- Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- 35.04 in (890.02 mm) - false precision on the conversion.
- 13 ft (4 m) waves - adj=on needed
- Wasn't a template originally, but I changed it. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Seems a bit disproportionate for the US to receive the same number of sentences as Mexico for Alex impact.
- Link tropical wave on the first usage (in TD 2, I believe), as well as other technical terms like wind shear.
- Steered west-northwest and then west - I think that "steered in a direction" should specify what did the steering; if you want to avoid describing the steering currents for brevity, just say the storm moved in that direction.
- the depression failed to organize appreciably, instead moving ashore South Padre Island, Texas, - instead? Is becoming a strong TC mutually exclusive with making landfall?
- Probably not. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- For TD 2, if you remove the line about predicted conditions, that would free up space for a little more info on what actually happened.
- A tropical wave first emerged - remove "first"
- Removed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- isolated towns [...] and prompting - parallelism needed.
- Good game. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- It seems unconventional to describe PR as a "neighbor" of DR, but your call.
- Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Upon designation, tropical storm watches and warnings were issued - dangling modifier.
- Approximately 14,000 Florida residents - the source says 14,000 customers, not residents.
- Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- storm surge of 0.94 ft (0.29 m) - source says 0.92 ft.
- Wow RIP. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- 3.25 in (82.55 mm) - false precision.
- 5.75 in (146.05 mm) - again.
- 8–9 in (203–229 mm) - again... I won't keep pointing these out, but make sure to get your rounding right throughout the article.
- RIP. Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- upper-level trough needs a link in Colin's section, as does "ridge".
- The Carolinas, swells from the storm caused at least 205 water rescues - decap "the" and "caused" → "prompted" or something.
- Decapped. Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- ITCZ - you never recorded this acronym.
- Recorded! TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Link eyewall replacement cycle
- Linked.
- leading to the rescue of 250 people - unless they were all rescued at the same time, it should be plural "rescues".
- Pluralized. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- RMS Titanic - italicize.
- Italicized. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Steered by strong ridge - caveman.wikipedia.org?
- Severe impacts from Earl in Antigua and Barbuda amounted to EC $34 million ($12.6 million USD),[79] where one person was electrocuted trying to restore power. - dangling modifier, and link the currencies.
- Undangled and linked. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Wind gusts neared or surpassed hurricane threshold - "threshold" → "intensity"/"force"/"strength" or something since the actual hurricane 'threshold' isn't determined by gusts.
- leaving streets flooded and many without power. - it left streets without power?
- left 187,000 residents in the dark - avoid colloquial phrasing like "in the dark".
- $3.5 million in economic losses. - "economic losses" means something specific; are you sure it wasn't just $3.5mm in damage?
- Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Three people were killed in rough seas off Florida,[78][88][89] one person was killed by rough seas off Maine,[78] and two people were killed by rip currents off New Jersey.[78] - surely there's a way to simplify this.
- Dictated by an expansive mid-level ridge - dictated?
- Directed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Fiona's juxtaposition between the mid-level ridge and the large circulation of Hurricane Earl - that isn't a juxtaposition.
- Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Seven people were killed in Texas and one person was killed in Oklahoma, - you can remove the second "person was killed".
- economic losses reached $240 million - same question as before.
- The most intense hurricane of the season began as a tropical wave that organized into a tropical depression about 90 mi (150 km) southeast of Cabo Verde by 06:00 UTC on September 8. - a bit longwinded.
- Shortened. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- fast paced - hyphenate.
- inner core realignment vague/jargony.
- Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- enabled a consistent weakening trend - if the storm was being weakened, that hardly seems like enabling.
- Changed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- while passing very close to Bermuda as a minimal hurricane. - you can afford to provide a specific distance.
- Provided. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- You have a couple "residents" that should be "households" or "customers" in Igor's section.
- Strong winds, with sustained winds of 80 mph (130 km/h) gusts to 107 mph (172 km/h) in Cape Pine, downed trees, downed power lines - this is all kinds of jumbled.
- Unjumbled. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Unclear why Igor was the costliest on record in NL but only the "worst" since 1935.
- Steered in traditional west-northwest fashion - needs "a".
- A is for added. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- As a reminder of limited hurricane intensity forecasting skill - how so? You don't contrast the RI with actual forecasts.
- I mean, the NHC did. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Gusts on the magnitude of 24–30 mph (38–48 km/h) - remove "on the magnitude".
- Removed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- How do you manage to get a landslide out of 0.4" of rain? Was the ground already wet?
- Listen man, I'm just the messenger. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- The interaction of a tropical wave and elongated trough - strictly speaking, a tropical wave is an elongated trough.
- Added another. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Some place names have links and other comparable ones don't... consistency needed.
- to weaken shortly - missing word?
- Nope, just the wrong one.
- uprooted hundreds of thousands and trees
- The Karl subarticle pegs the damage total at $5.6 billion, in contrast to $3.9b here. Which is the more reliable total?
- Good question. To through a bigger wrench, NHC lists $200 million USD. AON Benefield, which i think we all agree is reliable, has 3.9 billion. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
I'm getting a little bored, so I'll stop reading here and finish the other eight sections later. On-hold for now. – Juliancolton | Talk 15:43, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
More:
- Cape Verde hurricane needs a link
- You seem to use Cabo Verde and Cape Verde interchangeably throughout the article. Consistency needed.
- Consistency met. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- A tropical wave that moved off the western coast of Africa on September 11, the same that led to the formation of Julia, was responsible for the development of a tropical depression by - could be tightened: The same tropical wave that led to the formation of Julia..."
- Reworded. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- over 40 percent of the island's water supply was restricted at one point - restricted by what?
- and quickly strengthening into Subtropical Storm Otto six hours after formation - "strengthening" → "strengthened".
- the worst flooding in the nation's history—with accumulations up to 24.98 in (634.49 mm) - could be interpreted to mean floodwaters were only that deep.
- countless people - again, not really countless.
- Okay. :( TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- attained peak winds of 105 mph (165 km/h) at 18:00 UTC despite its unusually small size - compact storms can be as strong as any others; not sure this is a contradiction.
- beneficial to crops and otherwise low reservoirs. - remove "otherwise".
- Banana crops sustained minimal loss. - maybe not so important to mention?
- If you say so. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Richard maintained its intensity - seeing as landfall and peak intensity occurred pretty much at the same instant, you probably don't need to say it "maintained" strength during that brief interval.
- Alright. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- regarded as popular attractions for tourists - this is something that either is or isn't; remove "regarded as" if possible.
- Removed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- a jaguar that escaped after a tree opened its cage. - smart tree!
- They're evolving. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- stationary front needs a link.
- moving into Barbados "into" → "over"
- K. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions)
- on a calendar year "on" → "in"
- though it was feared many more could die as Tomas exacerbated an already-deadly cholera outbreak. - any update on this?
- The core of the hurricane remaining offshore likely prevented an even larger humanitarian disaster in Haiti.' - seeing as this is pretty much intrinsically true of any storm, and we're looking for concise summaries, I'd remove this line.
- Removed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- What makes [1] reliable?
- What makes it unreliable? Plenty of links to NOAA, information matches as far as I can tell... TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Ref 102 needs publisher info.
- This site appears to be a news aggregator. Try to find the original source if possible.
- Can't find one, but I am pretty bad at researching. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Questionable reliability: [2]
- Looks okay to me. St. Kitts news organization. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Sify News isn't an RS, so specify AP as the author for ref 156.
- Ref 166 is a bare url.
- Filled out. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
I think that's about it. – Juliancolton | Talk 20:10, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for the thorough review. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:52, 28 April 2017 (UTC)
- K, I'm satisfied with your changes. Thanks for taking action so quickly! Passing GA. – Juliancolton | Talk 23:15, 28 April 2017 (UTC)