GA Review edit

This review is transcluded from Talk:Sakura Wars 3: Is Paris Burning?/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Courcelles (talk · contribs) 16:32, 2 May 2018 (UTC)Reply


Opening for review. Courcelles (talk) 16:32, 2 May 2018 (UTC)Reply

  • "Defined as a "dramatic adventure" game," Defined by whom?
    • Clarified.
  • "Ichiro Ogami arrive in Paris to join the newly formed Paris Assault Force and train "Paris Division", an all-female unit established by Paris' government dedicated to fighting supernatural threats against the city while maintaining their cover as a cabaret act." Is there a way to rephrase not to say "Paris" four times in one sentence? Also, that's just a VERY long sentence in general.
    • Done my best with this.
  • "—, " Just the emdash will do,l no comma, no space.
    • Simplified this.
  • What is Les Chatte Noir? I mean literally, the black cat, but I've never heard of it, nor would define Montmarte this way.
  • I've explained what it is further down, following the modification inspired by your above observation.
  • "During the adventure segments, Ogami navigates Montmartre and the Le Chatte Noir from his apartment." Presumably you mean "starting from his apartment"?
    • Yep. Thanks for spotting that.
  • " to adjust to intensity of a single answer" To adjust to intensity? Check your wording.
    • I meant "the". Thanks for the catch.
  • " Paris Division fight monsters" fights monsters.
    • Sorted.
  • Unusual place to bring in the first mention of the "Flower Division" Who are they?
    • It's not the first mention. They're introduced in section's first paragraph.
  • "raise a character's Motivation," Raises.
    • Corrected.
  • "Sakura Wars 3 opens with Imperial Army Lieutenant" Don't pipe that link, let it specify Japanese directly.
    • Done.
  • You know what, you could answer at least four of these concerns simply by moving Synopsis above Gameplay. A lot of my answers are down here.
    • I'm a little uncertain about this, but alright I've moved it.
  • "A major theme of the game was talking with people" Is, as the game still exists.
    • Sorted.
  • Was it ever released outside Japan?
    • No. Clarified in the text.

Courcelles (talk) 16:58, 2 May 2018 (UTC)Reply

@Courcelles: I've done my best to address all your concerns. --ProtoDrake (talk) 21:00, 2 May 2018 (UTC)Reply
Re-reading. Courcelles (talk) 21:03, 2 May 2018 (UTC)Reply
Looks good. Promoting. Courcelles (talk) 21:08, 2 May 2018 (UTC)Reply

Orphaned references in Sakura Wars 3: Is Paris Burning? edit

I check pages listed in Category:Pages with incorrect ref formatting to try to fix reference errors. One of the things I do is look for content for orphaned references in wikilinked articles. I have found content for some of Sakura Wars 3: Is Paris Burning?'s orphans, the problem is that I found more than one version. I can't determine which (if any) is correct for this article, so I am asking for a sentient editor to look it over and copy the correct ref content into this article.

Reference named "SakuraRussia":

  • From Sakura Wars 2: Thou Shalt Not Die: "Акелла - Игры - Войны Сакуры 2" (in Russian). Akella. Archived from the original on December 9, 2016. Retrieved May 16, 2017. {{cite web}}: Unknown parameter |deadurl= ignored (|url-status= suggested) (help)
  • From Sakura Wars (video game): "Акелла - Игры - Войны Сакуры" (in Russian). Akella. Archived from the original on October 28, 2016. Retrieved May 7, 2017. {{cite web}}: Unknown parameter |deadurl= ignored (|url-status= suggested) (help)

I apologize if any of the above are effectively identical; I am just a simple computer program, so I can't determine whether minor differences are significant or not. AnomieBOT 10:06, 17 April 2019 (UTC)Reply