Talk:Robert Mallard/GA1

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Latest comment: 1 year ago by TompaDompa in topic GA Review

GA Review

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Reviewer: TompaDompa (talk · contribs) 00:59, 19 June 2023 (UTC)Reply

This is a WP:QUICKFAIL. Some of the issues I noted:

  • In general, the article needs thorough copyediting for grammar, capitalization, and so on.
  • Amy’s family went to Baltimore – this is the first time Amy is mentioned at all, which means the reader does not have the necessary context here.
  • Mallard Amy were driving home – I'm guessing this is meant to say "[Robert] Mallard and Amy were driving home". This is one of many examples where copyediting is needed.
  • The article says that Mallard was born in 1918 and died in 1948. The sources say he was 37 when he died.
  • The article says that Clifton and Howell were acquitted. The sources say that Howell was acquitted and the charges against Clifton were dropped.
  • Herman Talmadge did not order an investigation by the Georgia Bureau of Investigation (GBI). After looking at the case, the agents went to Mallard's funeral [...] – this is rather a non sequitur. An investigation was not ordered, but the agents looked at the case anyway? Either something is wrong, or some clarifying information is missing.
  • Of the five men who surrendered – this is the first mention of anyone surrendering (apart from the same information appearing in the WP:LEAD). How did that come about?
  • While Howell's lawyer, Thomas Ross Sharpe, used the tactic of putting the jury under oath and making them stand before the judge. – grammar aside, according to the sources only two jurors were called to testify. The rather important detail that they were used as character witnesses for the defense is also omitted.
  • The article does not mention that the defense claimed that Amy Mallard was armed when her husband was killed.

I'll add some maintenance tags to the article. TompaDompa (talk) 00:59, 19 June 2023 (UTC)Reply

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.